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Post by RandallBoggs on May 28, 2005 11:40:14 GMT -5
Who's interested in the first part of the chapter where Edna meets Randall? ^_^
I finally got a plot down and I'm gonna do the Inredible's crossover! ^_^
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Veg
Randall's Friend (800-1999)
Posts: 1,550
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Post by Veg on May 28, 2005 11:59:10 GMT -5
Sounds cool! ;D
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Post by RandallBoggs on May 28, 2005 18:50:51 GMT -5
Ok...that's Veg ^_^ Anyone else?
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Post by pitbulllady on May 28, 2005 20:18:52 GMT -5
Yeah, I'd like to see it-ought to be interesting if you can get Edna's personality down-pact. She certainly is about as different from Fungus as Randall will ever meet, short stature notwithstanding! I'd love to see how Randall will deal with someone like that, who's not the least bit intimidated by him nor afraid to put him in his place if she feels such a need.
pitbulllady
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Post by RandallBoggs on May 28, 2005 20:26:32 GMT -5
Well actually....I think I've done Edna pretty well.... Of course, this is just half of the chapter (I think...)
One moment ahh...
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Post by RandallBoggs on May 28, 2005 20:28:17 GMT -5
As said, I'm going to be making the Incredibles Crossover, SO I hope you guys will review. This is my first shot, and it might be a little confusing in terms of OVERALL plot, which I've got, but everyone would want to see how Edna could react to Randall so....here we go. First part...
Chapter 7 New Suit?
Randall was seriously reconsidering the offer that Bob had given him. Even as he sat in the back...well...trunk...of the car, he wasn’t all too happy about the idea. Why the heck did he consider even doing something “OW!”. “Sorry...speed bump...”. Randall mumbled under his breath as he held his fronds down with an upper hand. It was really stupid now that he thought about it. He wasn’t one of them at all. He was born with his talent...then again...they were. But he perfected it...well...ok...then again they did for themselves. Well at least he...aw heck...what was he complaining about? He got tired of being low too much. Getting to his feet slightly, but still keeping a low posture, he looked out. All he could see was a gate. But what awed him was the gate wasn’t like those for mansions. What intrigued him, if a gate could ever do that for a person, were the red tense lasers that acted as the gate itself. He knew allot about machines, duh, even that many scientists are in the works of creating such things. But Randall was feeling a bit off that something that’s hard to harness is...well...somebody’s front door. He got up to his feet, peeking between Dash and Violet, seeing Bob leaning over the his left side, consequently taking a slight off-balance on the car. “Edna? Edna you here?” Bob asked, like he knew her well. “What? Who is it!...Ah...darling...you’ve come back I...you don’t want me to fix that hobo suit again do you?”. All Randall could hear was a slight German one...then again...he wasn’t very good with accents. Bob shook his hand, like there was a screen in front of him...was there? “No no Edna...we need a suit...” Bob said in an asking tone. The German voice got enthusiastic. “Oh darling this is simply splendid...come in come in...is it the baby? I know he’s still short and stubby...but powers come at any time and...”. “No...Edna...it’s not for Jack-Jack...” Bob assured. “Very well...come in come in...”. Randall eased back when the gates opened and the car started up the hill driveway. He was getting more awkward by the minute, wishing that he could just yell out to stop this all together. But then again...this “super” thing would give him cover...when he left this family that is. His previous, several in fact, encounters with humans always led to pain in the end. And with someone like body...well...it would be more than lights out. Still...with this Syndrome after him...it would be good to get some professional help. Heck, if this Edna can make him an invincible outfit or one that would help his Blending, he’d be all ears...figuratively speaking of course. * It was a little bit of a struggle to get Randall out of the ca, though Bob and Helen saw to it easily though. Even as they walked through the decorated hall, Randall started to feel a sense of nausea, making his lower hands wrap around his stomach, while his top settled around his chest, Maybe it was the running he had to do throughout his years in the human world...or the worry he was being led into a human infested trap...he couldn’t tell. But the again...maybe it was that human women. What was her name? Mira? Marge? Mirage? Mirage. Wait. Yes. That’s what it was. Mirage. Even now he had a sense of awe about her. There was just...something about her that didn’t quite click. Even thought it was for a short time that they had met, it felt as if Randall already knew her. No. It wasn’t possible that he knew her. She was a human. Nothing more...and...nothing less. But still, Randall just couldn’t get her out of his head. The way she seemed so scared at what had been chasing her...and then to Randall himself. Well...as far as he was concerned...what was after him was after her. If they ever crossed paths again, he was sure he’d help. “Ah! Robert you’ve come back!”. A high pitched voice, or at least to Randall, his ears still were hurt, broke his concentration, making him look up. His nausea grew slightly weaker when he noticed only one other person in the room, at the bottom of small white steps. No one else. Just a rather...small...person. Randall was confused whether to scare the her or find a door...faintly he couldn’t tell. * Bob waved a hand as Edna started up the steps. “Ah...you didn’t bring that out-of-date trash that you asked me to mend for you last time...” Edna started, looking up at Bob. “No Edna...it’s not about...”. “Oh of course darling...” Edna interrupted, heading over to Jack-Jack, whom was carried by Helen. “Ah...here he is...” she started, tickling Jack-Jack slightly, making him giggle. “Oh please...” Dash said in a whisper, putting his back to the hallway wall. “Ow...”. He looked to see Violet nudge him in the shoulder, out of no-where, again. “So Robert...Helen...what is the baby’s power...I’d like to get started right away...”. “Uh Edna...” Helen started, but Edna kept on. “I was so excited...I kept guessing and guessing what the baby’s powers were that I just had to make a suit for anything I could think of!”. “Edna...” Bob started. “I had to order far and wide...which takes a while darling if you don’t have the right connections but...”. “Edna!” both Bob and Helen shouted. Edna just starred with the anger of being interrupted. “...Finally...” Bob sighed, “Edna...this isn’t about Jack-Jack...well...yet...it’s about...him...”. Helen moved out of the way, showing Randall still with an uneasy look behind her. Edna gave a gasp, making Randall know she was going to scream. She ran over to him. “Oh darling! You’ve brought me a challenge!” she yelled with pure delight. “Wha?” Randall whispered as Edna circled him. “Yes yes! I haven’t had such a challenge in all my years...”. She took one of Randall’s hands, looking it over with Randall’s confused cooperation. “Three fingers...ah...interesting...”. She moved over, looking at Randall’s “overall” form. She went back and took his tail in a hand. “Interesting...”. “HEY!”. Randall swiftly took an hand back and took his tail from Edna’s grip, making her go back over to Bob, hugging him. “Oh Robert...I create for gods yet you bring me...an Avatar...”. “What’s that...?” Bob asked, confused. “Something more higher than a god...I had to come up with some word...” Edna said, moving away. * Randall let go of his tail, his angered expression showing up. “(What the heck is this place!? Free-touchy world!?)” Randall scowled in thought. He never did like someone touching his tail. Edna started down the steps, motioning for Randall and the Parrs to follow. Randall trailed behind with Dash and Violet. “Edna’s weird...” Dash said, mainly as a whisper to himself. “Takes a weirdo to know one...” Violet retorted. Dash leaned over passed Randall to see her. “Takes one to say one’s one”. Violet leaned out. “That doesn’t make any sense. Randall growled, picking up speed as the two squabbled some more. He listened in on Edna, who was still raving on about what Bob “had brought her”. Randall was still waiting for her to say the word “it” soon enough. He started getting...“nervous” again when Edna slowed down to beside him. “So...what are you powers...I must know...” Edna started, whipping out a notebook and a pen, clicking it’s back so the ink tip would emerge. Faintly, Randall hated such things that related to the words “interview”. Still, Randall had to comply... “I thought you would have noticed I’m...”. Edna heaved a sigh, sketching down Randall’s figure on the pad, taking a few moments to look at Randall as she did. “Darling I know I know...One thing I’ve learned from Robert ever since he brought me that hobo suit to fix is that Supers come up everywhere...and without me they’d be wearing rags...” Edna said. Randall thought on that. “(Supers...anywhere huh?)” he thought. Edna insisted to go on. “Your powers...”. Randall felt a bit incline about the introductions. “I have a name you know...how ‘bout we start there...” Randall offered, his face nearly turning a bit more red. Edna heaved a sigh. “Edna Mode...” she said, seeming to think the idea a waste of time. Randall shook her hand. “Randall...Randall B...” he started. “First names are good enough...” Edna said, taking her hand away. “Now...well I don’t have to ask again do I?” she asked. Randall sighed, feeling nausea again. “Fine...”. Edna smiled. “Good...now I’ll need to know everything...”. She emphasized the last word. “(Everything huh...well...it’s all for my benefit so...)”. Randall took in some thought. “...Lets see...I can scale walls...see in the dark...well actually...I have...heh...these...” he said, opening his mouth to show his teeth and hidden forked tongue, though surprised Edna wasn’t moved, she just kept writing it down. “And...well...I can...sometimes...well...I can blend...”. Edna looked up for a moment. “Blend? What do you mean blend”. She stopped, turning to face Randall, he did the same. “I mean...”. “Like a chameleon right darling?”. Randall gritted. “Yes...”. Edna thought for a second, her left eye peering back at Violet as she squabbled with Dash, now about Tony Ridanger. She looked back to Randall. “Interesting...well darling...invisibility and...blending are two different things...but I suppose your overall features will make my work interesting enough...”. She started walking again. “...There’s a difference?” Randall questioned out loud. *
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Post by pitbulllady on May 28, 2005 21:56:48 GMT -5
That's really good-you DID nail Edna's personality and speech patterns down to a T! I can easily imagine that this is how she'd react to Randall, and not at ALL like HE would expect a woman who's barely over four feet tall to react, LOL! Very uncanny, but totally in character, how Edna would know that there IS a difference between "blending" and true invisability.
I guess this is part of a bigger fic, one which has some previous chapters, since it makes mention of Randall having met Mirage and realizing there IS something about her(boy, will those two be surprised when they learn that this "something" is, oh, about 99.9997% of the exact same DNA, the same biological parents, and same birthdate). And I can hardly wait to find out why Buddy is after Randall-is it because he'd consider Randall a Super, or because that redneck side of him demands a new pair of "lizard" skin motorcycle boots? THAT'S no way to treat a future(or maybe current-not stated as to whether he and Mirage have gotten back together and he's made an honest woman out of her yet)brother-in-law!
pitbulllady
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Post by pitbulllady on May 28, 2005 21:59:58 GMT -5
OH, couple more things-Tony's last name is spelled "Rydinger", with a "Y", and near the beginning of the story, you left the "r" off the end of the word "car", simple typo anyone can make.
pitbulllady
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Post by lizardgirl on May 29, 2005 5:52:35 GMT -5
Hey, good work- you've got Edna's personality exactly right. This story looks like it's really gonna go somewhere- can't wait for the next chapter! ;D
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Post by Mirage on May 29, 2005 8:55:00 GMT -5
Me neither--this story is great. Randall meets Edna! Lol...good work.
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Post by lizardgirl on May 29, 2005 9:32:52 GMT -5
Yeah, an interesting situation, to say the least. ;D
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Post by RandallBoggs on May 29, 2005 11:01:34 GMT -5
Thanks guys ^_^. I really did good? I will, hopefully, get the next part done this week. And start the story maybe this weekend.
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Post by lizardgirl on May 29, 2005 11:07:27 GMT -5
Looking forward to it. ;D
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Post by RandallBoggs on May 29, 2005 11:38:22 GMT -5
;D
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Veg
Randall's Friend (800-1999)
Posts: 1,550
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Post by Veg on May 30, 2005 22:11:01 GMT -5
Can't wait to see what happens next! ;D
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